Components to a Lasting Marriage
To have a successful and lasting marriage, the individuals involved must lay a foundation consisting of key components to make it last. A format and set of rules must be followed or established in order to make it a success. Sadly, today, because of the current high divorce rate, which is about 50%, couples constantly face marriage problems and marriage issues constantly arise. In unhappy couples the main focus is mainly on reciprocating negatively, in which a positive end-result is hard to procure. While on the other end of the spectrum, in happy couples, the main focus is to progress and to incorporate benchmarks to grow more as one. It’s the emotional feelings invested that will generate a positive outcome if a proper foundation of components is laid out from the beginning. The main focus throughout this paper will be to discuss how a successful marriage is achieved and the key components needed to achieve such a task.
Marriage over the centuries has evolved from culture to culture, land to land, but for the most part, the main roots of marriage have never changed. No matter what race, religion, or sex, marriage must have a stable foundation in order to last. What defines a successful lasting marriage? Is it love? Love is such a powerful word and can be viewed in so many ways and is usually defined by actions and/or emotions. Love can be viewed as the ultimate component of a successful marriage, but because of the inconsistent definitions and cloudy interpretations, it must be further defined and broken down into components. Therefore, love can be seen as a big building block of key components, which all lead to the ultimate goal of a successful relationship and a lasting marriage. Though there are many components and is debatable which work and which do not, what are some that one should have to invest in to achieve such an endeavor? By reading along further, there will be a story in which an example will be given of a couple that sustained essential components of a lasting marriage for over 65 years. Each key component will be discussed in further detail and related to how they can help maintain a lasting marriage. Finally, an application on how to achieve such a goal will be suggested and concluded with a personal thought.
Growing up there was always the thought of whom to get married to, what the partner was going to look like, what kind of personality were they going to have? After growing up, and living with the grandparents for 17 years, I realized these questions were minor, and I was going to need to find better qualities in a partner to achieve a successful relationship. All of these questions would constantly arise because there is always that one couple you admire as a child, that seems to have the ideal relationship, with a storybook ending. Ultimately, that is what everyone wants when they tie the knot and get married. While growing up, this was the thought I had of my grandparents. They were a truly loving couple. Every morning they would wake up and take their morning walk together. Every day, my grandmother would cook for my grandfather, making sure he has been fed, even though he may have just came back from the local pizzeria. Though it seemed like a monotonous routine, they never got sick of each other, and day-in and day-out, she would always wake up by his side, go for their morning walk, and end the day with a kiss goodnight, knowing that tomorrow was going to be another happy day together. They did this every day for the first 17 years of my life while living with them. More than anything, after witnessing their relationship, the love they had for each other was built on a foundation of components in which they must have established from early in their marriage. Being married for over 65 years and waking up every by each other’s side, showed immeasurable commitment, and in addition, the fact...
Cited: 1. Montgomery, Barbara M. The Form and Function of Quality Communication in Marriage. Volume 30, No. 1. National Council on Family Relations. 1981.
2. www.Saddleback.com. Todd. Empathy: The Key to a Healthy Marriage. April 4, 2011. http://saddleback.com/blogs/lakeforestcouples/empathy-the-key-to-a-healthy-marriage/
3. Swensen, Clifford H. Commitment and the Long-Term Marriage Relationship. National Council on Family Relations. November 1985.
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