Divorce: Marriage and People

Topics: Marriage, Divorce, Family Pages: 5 (1497 words) Published: October 8, 1999

Divorce rates in the United States have increased dramatically in the past 25 years. Over 40 percent of the marriages among young Americans will end in divorce. There is a lot of stress on all the people involved. The man has to deal with, usually, not seeing his children, being alone, and the responsibility that is accompanied with much of the legal process. The wife has to go through, maybe, entering the work force for the first time. Children are often viewed as a back burner issue but more often than none they are the center piece of discussion. The children may begin feeling inadequate around their friends and even in personal esteem. Feeling like it is their fault they might get depressed or perhaps even rebellious. Regardless, divorce is an activity that has become common place in today's family structure, behavior, and morality.

When two people meet and decide their love is strong enough to carry them to the next level marriage is usually the out come. Sometimes they decide to have children and sometimes they don't, but when they do, it usually brings them closer together. All parents have desires and hopes for their children. The way in which parents achieve these ends can differ. Researchers do not agree on which of the child-raising practices is best. But it is known that parents provide role models for their children and that children rely on their parents to teach them about the world.

When a culture's values and traditions undergo a rapid change it becomes difficult to decide which attitudes and beliefs children should be taught. As one researcher has stated, "today's children are the first generation to be raised amid doubt about the role prescriptions that have long gone unchallenged. This makes their socialization especially difficult. Traditionally, socialization was a process of raising the young to fill major roles in society when the present incumbents vacated them. Yet today we do not know what type of society our children will inherit, nor the roles for which they should be prepared. "(pp.34) Divorce along married couples is the most well-documented and studied of the various ways relationships end. According to Dworetzky:

Divorce rates in the United States have increased dramatically in the past 25 years. According to current assessments, over 40 percent of marriages among young Americans will end in divorce, of the children born in the last ten years, almost 50 percent will spend on an average of six years in a one-parent household. Nine out of ten children will reside with their mothers. Between 9 and 11million school-age children in the United States live in one-parent families. About one-half of all divorces occur within the first seven years of marriage with the first two to three years being an especially vulnerable time period for

divorce.(pp.47-63) The actual rate of divorce may only represent a small amount of the problem. It is unknown how many marriages end in non legal separations or how many married people stay together in an empty, essentially dissolved, relationship for the children's sake.

Of course, you do not have to be married to experience a separation from a close relationship. "If we add to the official divorce rate the number of cohabitation couples who break up, those who terminate their engagements to marry, break-up, steady dating partner, or otherwise bow out of a relationship, several million couples end intimate relationships each year.2"(pp.27-28,30)

So, why do people separate? Unmarried couples give us a number of reasons for separation. In one study, researchers followed over 200 couples for a three year period. "During this period of time, more that one-half of them ended the relationship. Seventy-eight percent of the men and women listed boredom as the major reason for the separation.(Kolata: pp, 42) Apparently their romantic, passionate love had lost it's power and there was little else...
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